For the past few weeks, being online has had my brow furrowed.
When I am scrolling, I am disgruntled about about a post, a picture, a comment, or a new headline.
Seeing people fighting and arguing.
Engaging in the arguments myself.
Sharing pictures and posts I normally wouldn't.
Losing people who don't wanna hear an opposing opinion.
It's definitely not my vibe.
However, what I can see and respect is that I can maintain my vibe while still showing up for really important (and sometimes stressful) conversations.
I have done my best to not be racist/judgmental my whole life.
I do my best to love everyone.
I've always tried to keep the peace in my sphere.
And sometimes, I fail at that.
Many will resist looking at racism and point at many other valid distractions to consider and calculate. While there are many components at play in this day and age, I believe we can all admit that we cannot achieve harmony if we do not address the issue of systemic racial inequality and injustice.
As we know, a transformative, heart-centered conversation that contributes to the end of racism can't be held online in a comment thread.
It will happen one on one.
It will happen at a dinner table.
It will happen behind closed doors.
It will happen in the car.
It will happen on a phone call.
It will happen in offices.
It will happen heart to heart.
As I have scrolled and shared, I have taken a particular stance to not just be moderately promoting peace and love.
I have decided to call out racism and white privilege and the Whyte mentality that if "I" don't have a problem then there is no problem.
This can be problematic because many people cry out for peace and love and unity but we cannot lock arms if our brothers and sisters are 100 miles behind us.
We cannot become our highest and best if we are not willing to go the depths of discovering the darkest sides of ourselves and our society.
It is a must.
We must be willing to see, be with, and integrate the things that make us uncomfortable.
In the brilliant words of my friend Carly Pandža, this is not a dress rehearsal.
Stop waiting for the performance to start.
This is your life.
This is your world AND 7 billion people are sharing it, having 7 billion different life experiences.
With that said, I have been struggling a bit to share my successes lately in a time that seems like there are more important things to discuss.
However, I also know that shining your light as bright as possible helps others know it is okay and safe to do so too.
I take responsibility for the awareness that my willingness to live unleashed has inspired hundreds to take crazy awesome leaps of faith. I completely honor the privilege of my impact and vow to keep showing up fully to inspire.
When I took this picture, I was bursting with pride and joy that I have made it to 4 months sober and 7 months celibate.
My personal and professional life has been going so good and social media has kind of become my least favorite part of my day.
I admit that because for the last four years, I have enjoyed coming on here to share my heart, progress, mission, and message.
I come on here to connect.
I come on here to share hope.
I come on here to share smiles like the one on this picture.
As you know me, I also come on here to share my pits and valleys.
I come on here to be messy and vulnerable.
While my life is currently going well, the world is a bit more messy.
I will keep showing up for any and all of it to vulnerably walk through it the way I know how to; honestly and humanly.
We are not perfect.
We don't always get it right.
We often question everything.
It is in our nature.
As I too navigate how to show up in my true nature and in respect of what is going on in the world, I keep in mind how blessed I am to have a group like this to come to.
I am beyond grateful for the Growing Gratitude community to come BE with.
I am grateful that we can come together to share our smiles and sometimes our tears.
I will keep doing my best.
I ask that you do too.
Keep showing up for THIS life in THIS moment.
There's no redo's or takebacksies.
Check in with yourself in the mirror and try smiling this big!
If you try, is it just as big or bigger??
Is it fake? Forced? Can you do it?
If not, why not?
If not, let someone you trust know that you aren't doing alright and allow yourself to be supported.
I think the greatest gift of this challenging time are the lessons:
We are better together.
We are not alone.
We are not meant to do this alone.
Keep showing up for your life, lovers.
This is your one and only!