Behind the scenes of adventure and excitement, there is this little gremlin in me. In Giving Up Giving Up: The Memoir of a Quitter, I tend to call her my 'inner critic.' In terms of work and projects, I call her a Control Freak. In either case, she can be a real B.
Moving to Portland to share transformation and possibility has my type-A, control freak in a 'what am I doing!?!' meltdown. My personal and professional world is in bags. My environment is tucked in bins and I am finding stuff one item at a time. Full steam ahead, the hot mess express is ragin' and rollin' on. I can't start one thing without being reminded of the 90 things undone on my to do list.
The best part of the ontological work I do is being able to laugh at how predictable this meltdown actually is! I would normally be in breakdown until I am able to get settled in and situated. I am experiencing am eyes-wide-open type of situation. I can watch myself slip into overwhelm, get my footing, and step right out. I am no longer thrown off by this derailment.
Previously, this kind of 'upset' to my organized mind would slow me down for days and weeks. Now, I am moving through this weekend with grace and ease. I even get a chance to find calm in the chaos. I get to have it all in the sense that I get enjoy the transition DURING the transition.
Thank you for your protection, Control Freak but you can kick the curb.
I have faith in my abilities.
I got this.
I am living a life I love♡
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