Miss You Already
My Sis wrote this on my mirror before leaving Portland and you can bet, I miss her terribly.
You know I LOVE adventure and discovery but I have a confession. I lost my footing. I have felt pretty disoriented the last day and a half being back here in California.
I went from chilly, rainy, and cloudy to sunny and 70°. This would normally make anyone leap for joy. I believe this time around, the relocation moved me from dreamer to doer in a whole new way.
Traveling down the coast reminded me of how small we are in this big world. I got intimidated. I am feeling it right now. I have been feeling worried about how I will get my message out and make the most impact.
I have felt like I forgot my mission. I was cranking out work with little return while in Portland and I was okay knowing that I am investing in my future. I have noticed that since I got here, I am making myself worried about reaching new levels of success. Persistence has always been my challenge and since moving to Portland, it has become faith.
Faith and trust that what I am doing will take me where I want to be has shook me to my core. I usually relate to this feeling as an invitation to conquer and in this moment, I am feeling plain old scared. It has caused me to question everything.
Yesterday, my gratitude was drowned in fear. I spent my day wallowing and doubting. I am okay admitting that to you because I am okay with being human. I am okay with admitting that I have JUST as many fears as any one of you. I am okay with not being okay.
I am sharing because transformation isn't easy. I love the work I do because I get to walk hand in hand with others doing the same thing; growing. Growth isn't always comfortable. The gratitude lies in the beauty of the journey.
My journey down the coast scared me.
Sometimes, my journey in life scares me.
Once the scared feeling passes (and it always does) I recalibrate and feel ready to get back into action.
So I will check in with gratitude for feelings being temporary but my commitment being permanent. I cannot shut off my heart knowing that it's dying wish is to live a full life and having others experiencing his/her fullest life.
I can coach and share because I am experiencing it for myself. A lot of people compliment my confidence or enthusiasm but they are born from listening to my heart AND following it. I am no different in having fears that tempt me to stop.
Don't let fear drown you. In your darkest moments know this: you are loved. You are INFINITELY loved!
There is nothing stronger than love and fear will never win the war.
Keep going in your quest to live your purpose.
Always, live a life you love.
For daily gratitude, join us in the Growing Gratitude community on Facebook! Thank you for growing with me and as always, live the life you love
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