I felt an immediate resonance when the 2024 word of the year came to me. I was laying down when I heard it. I smiled, exhaled, snuggled myself deeper into my cozy bed, and thought, but of course. One of my favorite activities in the world is nestling. I feel warm, soft, comfortable, safe, still, held, serene, and quiet. I am most comfortable, wrapped up in my sheets for example, when I feel nestled. It is a reward for an honest day’s work. It is a reprieve from the fast paced world we live in. It is a treat and simple joy that brings me so much pleasure. So it is no doubt that the word PLEASURE said itself to me in my most comfortable situation. I smiled in deep satisfaction and drifted off to sleep. – I have put a LOT of work into myself, my life, my business, and my passions. I have done a lot of deep healing and even deep rest and restoration. I know my work and I am incredibly proud of it. I have spent years deconditioning my relationship with hard work so that I could enjoy the fruits of my labor without stealing away my own joy because of guilt or shame for feeling so good and proud. I have resolved the previous equation I had made up that I must struggle for success. I am not foreign to commitment, dedication, focus, intentionality, and the like but I have decided not to associate pain and suffering with success just so that my success appears more noble. I don’t need to be seen scratching, clawing, and panting my way to my mountain tops, rather, I can arrive refreshed, upright, and maybe even whistling. What I have concluded is that I am incredibly gifted. There are a lot of things that come very naturally to me and I have decided that it is okay if it looks as easy and fun as it usually is. I love a challenge and I am inspired when I more fully realize my capacity. That doesn’t mean I have to make anything unnecessarily hard for the sake of seeming relatable. I prefer to challenge other people beyond their comfort zone and to reach for their next level of greatness. Both personally and professionally, I have dedicated myself to enjoying my rewards and abundance without capping the enjoyment and, you guessed it, pleasure. Depending on who you are and how you were raised, the word pleasure may have a negative connotation. It has often been condemned as a virtue of the condemned. Some folks associate pleasure with selfishness, lust, gluttony, or other precariousness. Pleasure in this year’s context feels synonymous with reward, fascination, enjoyment, relishing, savoring, appreciating, and the like. Pleasure has presented itself to me as both a noun and a verb. I will enjoy the sweet nectar of the many fruits of my labor. I will take pleasure in my own company and the company of others. I will set boundaries and standards with pleasure. It will pleasure me to expand my capacity for the moreness of life. It will be pleasurable to love and be loved. – In 2024, I will revel in what life brings me. I simultaneously see a lot and nothing on the horizon. I am open to what comes and goes. I am okay with it all and I take pleasure in the unfolding of this journey. What most are disoriented by, I have practiced feeling into. I once needed more answers than life was offering and it gave me incredible anxiety. I used to only feel relief when I had a sense of control over my situations and emotions. I accepted that I hardly even have control over my emotions. More like, I simply practice witnessing, allowing, welcoming, and feeling them. Practicing this much edgeless surrender broke me of my need to know anything and cracked me wide open to enjoying floating down the river of life without being able to see around the bend. I take pleasure in the mystery.
I can appreciate not knowing. For the things I have not yet learned to feel pleasure for, I have at least learned to respect and honor as an essential part of my humanness and maturation. Life has proven time and time again that it has far more blessings in store for me than I could ever plan for myself. So instead, I grow through what I grow through and flow along. And I take absolute pleasure in making the most of every moment. I am certain that 2024 will deliver pleasure in great abundance. Happy New Year, my friend. It is an honor and a pleasure to be here together. -- If you would like to explore your new year's desires together, email me [email protected] for a complimentary 30 min Discovery Call. I would love to support you creating a life you love. Check out my VIP immersion for a more intimate container.
1 Comment
Y'all, I made the LONG overdue upgrade to a Blue Yeti Microphone and it has changed the game overnight.
I tell you this to share a little known secret about my journey with scarcity: I used to (and sometimes still do) hesitate to invest in the best products. I fear I won't use them to their capacity. I fear I will break them in my travel lifestyle. I believe I can get away with a more cost effective alternative. The list goes on... Also, part of my outdated scarcity mindset is being thrifty and proud. Well, I have learned over and over throughout my career and that great products and services are worth the investment. I am sure you have heard the phrase, "You get what you pay for." Well, in my money mindset healing journey, I have proven that to myself time and time again. Sure there are a few exceptions but at this point in my career, I know that I want quality over quantity and that comes at a certain price. Sure, a simple microphone is prompting this lesson but learning it has helped me make some of the most important business decisions of my career. It has helped me raise my rates appropriately and make a living doing what I love. It has allowed me to make a difference doing work I am great at because I am properly supported with great tools to do it all. If you are a content creator looking to improve the quality of your material, grab this Blue Yeti and start recording crisp content like never before. If you want to hear the difference, you can check out my Midweek Meditations on my YouTube Channel and subscribe to the Hearts Unleashed Podcast where I have started recording all of my newest episodes with this stellar mic. And remember, you get what you pay for. I love a great deal or discount but I am willing to invest in myself and my future because I am worth a high quality of life, and so are you.
Be willing to be misunderstood. Be willing to disappoint others.
It's really okay when others do not support or agree with your decisions, actions, desires, or lifestyle. It's not their life. They haven't walked your path. They can't hear the whispers or your heart...shit...you hardly can When we finally decide to follow our heart and honor our truth, people might question it. Simply put, those are not the ones to rely on for encouragement or support. THAT DOES NOT mean we block them and move on. It means we surround ourselves with a team that matches the frequency of the life we are living into and we proceed with the life we are creating. Anyone who doubts us is just putting our own insecurities on loud speaker: CAN I really do this? IS this smart? IS this safe? HAVE I considered all the challenges? WHAT IF I fail? WHAT IF I succeed?? People's doubts and judgement are just something within us that is currently hidden from our view to identify within ourselves, heal, clear, bless, and release. As far as that other person, bless them for their care, protective efforts, and love. Thank them for the new insight into yourself. Then move on. Love them where they are and be okay if they don't understand your desires and actions. This doesn't mean we cut them out. We probably love them. They are probably friends and family. This just means we do the inner work of being okay with the discomfort of being misunderstood. It means being okay with the ideas of not meeting someone else's expectations of you. It means seeming to 'fall short' of some social norm. I disappointed people when I left teaching. I confused people when I left corporate. I was warned about the inconsistencies of being self-employed. If I made other people's fears, concerns, or priorities more important than my vision, I wouldn't be where I am. I would probably be doing something great. I am sure I would but nothing as rewarding as honoring my heart's calling in the face of resistance. I would NOT be doing fulfilling work that I love, makes a huge difference, and pays more than I could imagine. I know this because I would have put others before myself in a way that I would be creating my life based on what others believed was good for me. We can let our people love us without letting them run our lives, thoughts, and actions. So, I challenge you. Who are you afraid of disappointing? In what ways are you afraid of being misunderstood? What judgment are you so afraid of? Are you willing? Are you willing to follow your heart and just let people not get it? Here's a fun protip from the future. They will get it in your winning season....but likely not a moment sooner. It will take your own permission to proceed.
In 2019, I had to confront my own fears, concerns, insecurities around being politically, societally, morally, or religiously incorrect for the ways I was teaching, preaching, and representing myself.
The more I leaned into exploring my feminine side, the more 'inappropriate' it felt. I felt shame for my more mature views, beliefs, insights, and desires. I believed that society prefers sweet girls and that the only honorable way to be a woman was to be married or a mother. Furthermore, women who were confidently in touch with themselves, their boundaries, and their independence were intimidating, aggressive, and some version of too much. As I explored my feminine nature, got more tattoos, came out as bisexual, shared my love of being nude, encouraged people to wildly chase their dreams, and started contemplating the realities of this dimension, I spent some time concerned about what my former students, their parents, and my former colleagues might think of me living more self-expressed and exposed. I didn’t really realize how afraid I was until I started venturing out into unfamiliar territory. I was afraid family and friends would disown me. I was afraid to offend. I was afraid enough of rejection that it has taken years to blossom open into the level of self-expression I find myself living into these days. I was afraid of losing the positive role model title I had become accustomed to since high school. I was afraid mothers wouldn’t want their daughters around me. I was afraid people would make fun of or pretend not to know my heart anymore. I was scared to feel outcasted because I cause people shame or discomfort. I have always taken pride in positively affecting people and I was afraid that unleashing all of me would strip me of my admiration. What I realized in the depth of my inner work was that I was thinking and operating from years of conditioning of what being an adult means. I had a certain definition of a respectable woman. I had patriarchal beliefs about women, their bodies, and sexuality. I had a whole structure in my head that was formed based on what I had observed throughout my life. But as I kept dismantling all these beliefs, I liberated myself and others. You see, I have had a lot of role models in my life that became very human as I (we) have aged. I saw leaders that I put on a pedestal fall from grace when I have witnessed them act like the primal humans that they are. I have experienced disappointment, shame, and weirdness when I saw the people I thought had it all together were really falling apart behind the scenes. I have no doubt that many people have experienced this with the elders, mentors, and teachers of their time. This isn't meant to make anyone wrong. In fact, the exact opposite. This realization helped me to become human as well. It granted me permission to stop pretending or striving for perfection. I was already very human but I wasn't acknowledging all the parts and aspects of me; my multidimensionality. I was trying to uphold some unrealistic version or expectation of the model person. The upstanding citizen. The humble Christian. The perfect teacher and coach. The list goes on and we all have our own versions. I stuck with and extenuated the parts of me that won people's approval like the clean cut, homegrown, all-american, midwestern girl. The athlete. The winner. The wife. The corporate manager. But (without my knowing at the time) I was compartmentalizing the more complex, diverse, and marginalized versions of myself. The part of me that gets sad and angry. The introvert. The judgmental part of me. The natural beauty. The one who thrives on adventure. The one who has high standards. The sensual and sexual part of me. The inquisitive deep thinker. The one who loves money. The one who loves herself. The business leader. The philosopher. The goddess, the angel. In my self-exploration, forgiveness, and acceptance journey, I had to grant permission to be and unleash all the parts of me. The parts I thought were dark or grotesque and the parts that I though were too pretentious and arrogant. I had to be okay with the nausea that comes with feeling vulnerable and exposed. I had to be okay with any negative feedback, praise, criticism, rejection, opinions, questions and other consequences that come with living out loud the way I chose to. Exploring and sharing has always been worth it because on the other side of that incredible discomfort is rapture. On the other side of that risk is reward. On the other side of that pain is pleasure. On the other side of that disruption is clarity. On the other side of those deaths is life. An unlimited and unleashed life of authenticity will blow your mind. Living is as easy as breathing when you are living fully expressed and I have crossed enough of those thresholds to know it is worth it (and safe) every single time. Something else that I have solidified is that I will be my core self at every level of the game. My fear about rejection slowed (because I don't think it ever 100% shuts off as humans) when I really came to acknowledge the truth of who I am. No matter what skin, identity, clothes, or title I have on, I will always be: Rich, nourishing love Depth, truth, and life force energy Sweetness, laughter, play and innocence Joy - hilarious joy Fierce love Divine knowing Maternal, mother nature Sensual self-acceptance Empowered masculine and feminine Multidimensional expression Multifaceted passion Diversity and versatility Deep listening and receiving An emotional hug Guardian angel God and goddess The embodiment of unconditional love The core of me will always be love and I will always integrate the shadows of my humanness. The depth that I have gone has taken me to the heights I have gotten to soar. My inner work and self-acceptance have made me healthier, wealthier, happier, lighter, and sexier. It has made the adventure of life such a rich and nourishing experience, even in the toughest of times. It has helped me become more attuned and impactful in my commitment to unleash the hearts of others. I am obsessed with this life and journey and I have hardly just begun. What a beautiful ride. I will always be living a life I love. I have been prepping our Speaker's Stage guests for their talks and felt like sharing a few speaking tips for anyone out in the world pitching themselves (aka everyone).
We might be applying for a job, talking to someone in line at the bank, going out on a first date, or trying to connect with a new potential client. Either way, being able to talk about yourself in 3 minutes or less will keep people engaged in what you are sharing as well as encourage them to dig deeper and get to know you more. When you have a free moment, it's good to put a three-minute timer on and talk into the mirror to realize how long and short three minutes can really be! A great simple format when introducing your self is to speak to your objective or desired outcome. For example, if you want the someone to know you are an author and want them to buy your book then that's how you would introduce yourself. If you are meeting a handsome man (or woman), you might make it clear that you are single and ready to mingle! If I am a podcaster and I want you to listen to my podcast then that is how I will introduce myself. If I am applying for a new job, I will speak about how I align with the company's values and goals. A bonus component would be to share a bit of your passion and/or expertise. People love to know each other on a personal level so don't keep it all business or refined. Let us into your heart and mind a bit! Another angle you can approach a quick introduction or opportunity to make an impression is by teaching or entertaining to make an impact. You might tell a quick story or share a lesson you learned in life that has really transformed you. No matter which format you choose; you could/would/should have a "call to action" (or invitation) at the end of your talk or introduction. Let people know how they can connect with you and stay in contact! That may be an email, a social media follow, or an exchangeof phone numbers. Whateves. You want to leave people wanting more but don't leave them clueless on how to find you out in the world. Make the connection and nurture it. I think you might be happy you did. I hope this gives you the courage you needed today to speak up and share that unleashed heart of yours! If you would like to practice your public speaking, join us on the Speaker's Stage! All who would like to speak are welcome. I would love to have you there. Check heartsunleashed.com/shop for the most current programs and offerings It is only through a commitment to expansion will you actively surface more of what there is to heal.
I used to make myself wrong when I uncovered more shadow work. I would judge myself as unhealed and incomplete and criticize myself as a fraud for 'acting' like a sage or mystic when I found myself to be deeply flawed. Then it dawned on me. I never really faced any dark shit when I lived a cushy life. I never had to deal with anything uncomfortable when I lived a comfortably life. I believe in ease, flow, joy, and all that jazz and I believe that when you expand beyond the norm, you will deal with resistance and darkness beyond the norm. The life path that pulled me out of my comfort zone chose me before I chose it. It put me through the tumbler. Then, I would choose to jump in the tumbler, knowing it would take me higher, farther, and closer to my fullest potential. Now, I commit to my calling over and over again and accept a season in the tumbler without toppling. The tumble would predictably send me spiraling into existential crisis and meltdown and now, I am able to tumble, stumble, and center. I would feel like a fraud for still building a transformation business and calling myself any type of leader while struggling my way through a season of shadow work. -as if I was supposed to crawl into a cave during this season and only come out and back new, shiny, and polished. That was back when I needed to prove my worth as a leader, coach, and guide. Now I understand that a function of being a leader, coach, and guide is walking through a dark night of the soul clear about the light within casting clarity through the thick of it. I have come to understand that great teachers teach from the other side of the trenches. I used to think I had to stay in or get back into the trenches to pull others out until I heard, "God doesn't come down from Heaven to save or answer his people." I feared that being fine in life would diminish my value as a relatable leader. I was concerned that not prioritizing other people's fears would offend and disqualify me as relevant or valuable. I was concerned that other's would judge the human nature to yell, cry, laugh, react, and walk away would diminish my power as a potent guide. I thought....I feared...I assumed...I believed....I could go on and on about my limiting beliefs, narratives, and patterns. The point is none of it has anything to do with the massive difference I make with humans. If anything, further focusing on it impedes my ability to do so and that is not who or what I am. I am a guide, channel, mystic, lover, leader, teacher, coach, and more. Over the years of development, I have capped this in various ways. I have also unleashed it to varying degrees. And here I am unleashing it a bit more. It has taken years and layers to develop an unrelenting okayness with our complete and utter not knowing and surrender any desire to control or manage (manipulate) outcomes. It's so.....gripless. It's so wordless. It is nothing, and it is everything. And it is an endless unfolding of surrender and receiving. A destinationless journey through the wild unknown. Along the way, I have found that the greatest leaders also allow themselves to be led. By those ahead of them and a higher power. I have been a great leader and led by great leaders. If you are a great leader, who specifically recognizes a Mystic is rising within and who is ready to step out, I invite you to the Mystic Rising Retreat in Sedona this September. Message me for more information or to register. I didn't know (until I did) that my religious conditioning had me believing that surrendering to the will of God/Spirit would turn me into the traditional catholic saint/martyr that has to renounce all my life, relationships, and possessions and live as a pauper.
I had so often feared that surrendering to the urges and downloads of spirit would require I release all worldly needs and desires. I thought surrender equaled a sacrifice of joy. This belief has capped my level of surrender and fear of releasing control. "I surrender (as long as it will take me where I imagine)" is not surrender. I had to decondition my religiously rooted narratives and make my personal connection with the divine to understand, accept, and trust that spirit is benevolent and has my best interests and wellbeing in mind. I believe we are inherently good. I believe we are fragments of god/spirit/divine who have access to the infinite intelligence of all that is. I believe we come from unconditional love and grace. I believe that the human experience can be challenging, not that we have fallen from grace and must earn our way back to a heaven or promised land. I believe that we have endless potential. I believe that joy, love, and abundance are part of a divine life as much as surrender, compromise, sadness, fear, grief, and more. I believe in the entire range of emotions and experiences and getting to have the most adventurous and beautiful life possible. I believe it can be so fun to surrender to the inspirations of spirit - specifically the guidance far beyond our sense or comprehension or desire. I am constantly committed to a level of surrender that I cannot possibly predict and I am willing to believe it is better than I could ever dream up, plan, or design myself. This has been a healing and evolution for the last two years, specifically, as the Mystic within has emerged. I have been able to feel, hear, and sense spirit from within and the guidance and urges have gotten stronger with time and more surrender. If you have been experiencing this ascension, I invite you to join me at the Mystic Rising Retreat in Sedona this September. We will be working on areas such as: Healing in the Feeling The Power of the Pause Radical Self Acceptance Chanting, Channeling, Crystal Work The Vipassana Meditation Practice Hear the Unsaid, Feel the Unfelt, See the Unshown Building a Mystic Business If you are a leader and your spiritual leadership is making its way through, I encourage you to lean in further towards your calling and development.
*read to the bottom to get thousands of dollars’ worth of free coaching*
I cried in the recording of the last module of my Hearts Unleashed Leadership Academy curriculum. I explained in the video that I created and sold my first course, Time To Shine, in November of 2018. I was recording that last video in November of 2022 and I was realizing, live on video, that I had been putting this academy curriculum together for four years straight. I laughed through my tears, announcing that I had put myself through my own university. I gave myself a degree in Emotional Intelligence and Subconscious Reprogramming. Week in and week out, I just did what I sensed was next to do. Some months were easier than others. Some days I questioned myself (and everything). Some seasons, consistency was a challenge and at other times, it was so natural and inspired. Nonetheless, I completed exactly what I was shown in my mind’s eye. Then, I turned around and certified other women in Emotionally Intelligent Leadership. “This is a certification you can put on a resume”, I told them in our first mastermind call in Jan 2022. I saw ears perk and smiles grow on the women who had just invested a significant amount of time, money, and energy to the development of their leadership. The courses were designed, coached, and eventually turned into digital courses that the HULA students walked through together for the entire year. I also told them to write a letter to the December 2022 version of themselves. A letter to who they would be after completing four back to back personal and professional self mastery courses created to unleash the authentic leader within. So, as I sat there, crying in the call, December 2022 me did not anticipate the end of a remarkable four-year journey. I took a major exhale and leaned back in my chair after that call, feeling an unforgettable sense of completion. I was overwhelmed with such a sense of satisfaction, like I imagine Michelangelo felt the day he stepped back from his sculpture of David after 3 years of chiseling away at stone. I was given guidance, had a vision, and followed through step by ever loving step to complete the task at hand. Many people don’t really understand the level of dedication practiced in building a sustainably successful business. I too, as a first and second year entrepreneur, hoped for the illustrious ‘quantum success’ of five figure months after launching one or two ideas. Most people never give any idea enough time and energy to let it mature and develop into a fully functional structure. And a lot of people mistake what I do as freestylin’ my way through life. While I sure do love freedom, flow, and surrender, those luxuries require integrity, consistency, commitment, and follow through. My moves have been downloaded, written out, prayed on, calculated, saged, and implemented. Through this work, I feel like the biggest lessons of my life have become patience and grace. My patience has been stretched and developed more than I ever planned for. More than I ever, EVER asked for. Not just in the execution of the plan but in how it has been revealed to me. I have been shown more, much like a video game, where you the only way to find out what’s at the next level is by passing the current one. That said, I have something I am very excited to share. The next stage of the Hearts Unleashed Leadership Academy curriculum has been revealed and y'all have DeQwan Young to thank for delivering the message and sparking the inspiration to share thousands of dollars’ worth of content for free! The courses are still for sale on heartsunleashed.com with extra features, materials, bonuses, and coaching options AND the curriculum modules themselves will be going up live on YouTube @AbigailRoseGazda FOR FREE! Modules will be coming out every Tuesday and Thursday at 12pm pst for 10 weeks straight! I encourage you to subscribe and share with those who have been praying for emotional guidance through self-discovery, self-development, self-mastery, and transcendence. I encourage you to check them out and send them to folks for whom you know the information would make a lasting difference. I invite you to take advantage of the opportunity to walk through the journey of unleashing the authentic leader within. And I always hope to inspire you to live a life you love. If you have questions, message me. If you are ready to take the work a step forward, email me [email protected]. If you know you are ready to live an extraordinary life, reach out. There is more to life and there is more to you. Let’s unleash that beautiful heart of yours. I spent my entire weekend with the amazing Hearts Unleashed Team and Community for our 3rd annual HU Retreat.
I feel like harmonic best describes this perfectly memorable event. I have much more to write about it coming soon. Today, I predictably had a transformation hangover. The team and I took our time packing up and heading out. I stayed at my teammate and friend, Erin's house for the afternoon to reorganize the van and do laundry. We grabbed dinner and Erin Glover offered me to stay the night but I today I wanted to get to the lake that Tamara Fogle suggested so I could wake up next to said lake. Welp, around 7:30pm I slowly cruised for 50 min at my own pace, under the full moon, listening to some of my fav music and pulled into a campsite RIGHT at the water's edge. I am sitting here, completely overwhelmed with joy and gratitude that it is my first official night out of this solo travel adventure. That doesn't discount the whole week of already living in the van in driveways. However, tomorrow morning, I will slide my side door open to one of the visions that kept me building diligently all summer. I pulled into my campsite and shed a few tears of fascination. I will sleep warm and well in my new home after the completion of another perfectly memorable weekend with the community built by my company and cohort. I am never short of gratitude for this amazing life. My heart is bursting with excitement and love. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for those who have encouraged me along my journey. It is such a pleasure to share life with you. A new adventure has just begun 💕 Headed back to Indiana after a full, long weekend in Asheville, North Carolina for HU House's third author, Whitney Durmick's book launch!
Whitney wrote Half Wild: a prayer for a generation of roaming malcontents and it has recieved so many amazing reviews on Amazon! I am so stoked to have been enjoying three of my favorite things: -Freedom of the open road -Launching new books! -Golf I had quite the outer body experience making the 10 hour drive (in 14 hours) down to NC Thursday. I would stop to gas up and realize I was driving around in my future home! I would park, jump out of the driver's seat and straight into MY BED in the back of my van! I had many a laughing fit on my way through Indiana, Tennessee, and Kentucky on my first freedom road trip. I giggled with delight as the terrain got hillier, more lush, and even mountainous as I grew closer and closer to my destination. The outer body experience continued as I hugged Whitney, her fiancé, and dad hello and munch down the delicious steak dinner waiting for me upon my arrival. We talked launch party prep details and then spent our Friday rearranging the house for the few dozen guests we would be welcoming on Saturday. I was the furthest out of my body and floating in bliss as I watched Whitney read a chapter of her debut book to some of her closest friends and family. The frequency in the room was that of love, joy, celebration, and deep appreciation. I get re-inspired all over again any time I see someone's dreams and visions come to life. It never gets old to me. You know what else never gets old to me? Golf. Sunday, we hit the links to unwind and get some more quality time together during our short visit. I stopped multiple times today to look around and breathe the scene in deeply. Being tucked into the mountains of NC, it was saturated with pine, wet mud, and the southern drawl of men on parallel fairways. I also stopped and laughed to myself as I showered after golf, before dinner, and repeated about a hundred times "I get paid to work where I want, when I want, how I want, with who I want, for how much I want." In making my dreams come true, I get to help people's dreams come true and I get to golf along the way. I will be golfing and launching books all over the country in my new van home and I would love to encourage you to follow along by subscribing to my YouTube channel Abigail Rose Gazda |